unafraid's Diaryland Diary

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i'm tired. so tired.

The desire to drive around for an hour or so when i got to school today was worse than yesterday. i hesitated before putting the car in park and turning it completely off. luckily though, i have friday off from school so i don't have as many days left of the week to dread.

aaron called me today and asked me about getting prom tickets. we're going as friends so we're getting them separatly. we chatted about concerts and after-prom plans. when we got off i started to think about our past relationship. he treated me almost like a queen and was so good to me. but i threw it all away. he treated me wonderfully, yet i couldn't find deeper feelings for him than friendship. why is it that the guys i like don't like me back, and the guys that like me, i only see as friends? i think i just have to accept it soon and go on with life. i don't necessarily need a male...but it would be nice to have that feeling again that i'm wanted. maybe that i'm needed. until this happens once again...i'll just wait and find something else to keep my mind off of it. i need to get my mind off of that and so many other things right now. i'm spacing out again. i need to go for a drive.

later.

9:07 p.m. - April 10, 2001

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